The corridor is lit by neons, floors are covered in a kind of rubbery material, reminiscent of school but this is a hospital, in the middle of the night. The walls must have been white at some point. Dim lights, we haven’t gotten to registration yet. We are waiting to be called. We are alone in this big empty hall.. My mother is silent. I fell on my arm. The pain shoots with every heart beat... Finally, I get called: I have to go alone. I am directed to another waiting room with harsh neon lights. It is packed.. A woman is crying, she looks pretty inebriated, her arm is all black and blue, her boyfriend is trying to comfort her. I won’t look at my arm. It is covered anyways. Im here to check if it is broken or not. I would keep my fingers crossed, but nothing is responding down there but pain. I am a dancer you see, and tomorrow, I am to open in a show. We havent called the tour manager nor the producer yet.Some people come in in shackles, with security guard on each side. They get registered, and taken to another room. The wait is long, perhaps four, five hours. There is an old woman with her shopping cart still next to her. She fell at the supermarket. Its now close to 2 am. I’m not sure what she has hurt. Oh. I spot it. Her hand. And perhaps an ankle too. Time has taken a different pace. The hospital don’t seem rushed either, not that many people working, perhaps thats the problem: there aren’t enough and we are many. When i got home earlier that night everything had changed. A colleague of mine, also a dancer, stayed in my flat while I was away. The place was spick and span, he had moved the furniture around. There was a chair by the window, its back to it. It faced me as I entered the room. It stood under plants that hung from the ceiling. Elegant.. I unpacked, and then on the later side, i sat on the chair. I d never sat that way, looking in. The room looked smaller. I looked up at my plants. Had they been watered? I was wearing loose silky pants that often caught around my feet and made me stumble during the most mundane walks. I stood on the chair, watered the plants and jumped off. Im not sure what pulled me to the floor, the doctor said I was lucky I put my arm there, for it would have been my head other wise. It was so violent. As if space was knocking me out and the moment was locking me in. Of course. I blamed the chair. My mother blamed the trousers.
Really good. xox